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Natasha Romanoff ([personal profile] maskirovka) wrote2021-07-20 01:46 am
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vanilla 🥰 | it's here that i've got to stay

[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-20 09:12 am (UTC)(link)
When a car pulls up into the dirt driveway, Bucky figures it's a good thing he hadn't gone along with Sam and Sarah into town like he had originally planned.

Although the threat of Walker has since diminished with the shield exchanging hands, Bucky nor Sam believe it's over. Nothing ever is. It's one fight into another one. Despite it being a negative way to view things, Sam's heeded Bucky's warning despite the roll of his eyes and muttering of him always wanting to poke holes in things that don't have holes. Someone with Walker's ambition and need to be better, to be the person that his city needs, the hero that he pictures himself to be to make up for the void tearing at his sense of self inside of him is something Bucky recognises won't let him stop. A brutal defeat at an abandoned warehouse is only going to fuel his fire even hotter.

Calling in for extra reinforcements to help deal with him was the only smart idea Sam had. Although Bucky doesn't know Natasha as well as he knows Sam, Steve trusting her is enough for him to easily roll over and agree to the plan with an uncharacteristic easiness. If Steve had trusted her enough to recruit the Avengers who had been in hiding while he'd been in Wakanda getting his head screwed on straight, she was good enough for him.

Walking out from the side of the house, he begins to pull at the sleeve of his blue shirt, currently curled above his elbow, down to cover his arm. It's a self-conscious move he doesn't even think about. His step's easy, almost lazy. Bucky had been out the back trying to fix something Sarah had specifically forbidden him from fixing for her. It seemed like the perfect opportunity to give a little back to a family who had given him too much.

When Natasha steps out of the car, he lifts his hand with a bend of his wrist in a small wave. "You're early. Sam's going to be really disappointed I was the one who said "hey" first," he says with a small lopsided grin. He likes the fact Sam's so competitive with him to a childish point. It makes things feel easier, his interactions less burdened.
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-20 09:53 pm (UTC)(link)
"Yeah, well..." He lifted a shoulder, the corner of his lips curving upward. "The magic of washing your hair and cutting it." And no longer looking like the property of Hydra.

While it made him feel a little good to have someone who was familiar with him as the Winter Soldier comment that he didn't look like the Winter Soldier, it still made Bucky a touch nervous. Natasha was Sam's friend, not his. He remembered vividly how he had tried to kill her a handful of times.

With his sleeve now down to his wrist, it was a subconscious move to hold his left hand against his hip. While the people of Delacroix took to celebrating his arm more than being afraid of it, he'd quickly developed the habit in New York to hide away his hands just in case. One could never be too prepared—or paranoid—that someone might recognise the metal arm, put two and two together, and either rightfully accuse him of a murder of a loved one or run for the hills. Bucky always expected the worse.

"Sam had to go into town with Sarah, but I can take you inside if you wanted to put your bag down."

Moving, pretending that he knew how to be a host, and trying to act normal seemed like a better idea than standing around in the heat. Sam would kick his ass for being weird.
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-20 11:07 pm (UTC)(link)
Easily, he answered, "He's really possessive about them." Or he was simply possessive about them with Bucky. Everything Sam did was in good humour. If he didn't trust Bucky, Bucky knew he wouldn't be left alone in his family home.

Scratching at the side of his neck, Bucky wondered for a brief, almost painful moment, what he was meant to do. Without Sam here to break up any of the awkwardness he felt, he had to rely on himself to slip back into being James Barnes. It turned out that it was a lot harder to slide his feet back into his old, very worn shoes after seven decades of not wearing them.

"You can put your bag in here," he said, easily walking from the kitchen to the living room. Maybe playing host would be a lot easier than trying to think of conversation topics that suggested he had a social relationship with Natasha. His duffle bag sat neatly beside the arm of the couch; two pillows that were clearly used for sleeping were piled against the arm.

Stepping back to the doorframe, he crossed his arms against his chest and glanced around with a slight furrow to his brow, as if in search of something. Perhaps Sam left a post-it note that said If Natasha arrives early, DO THESE STEPS.

"I'm not too sure what Sam had planned for you. The tour I got was kitchen, couch, bathroom—and I'm pretty sure he'd skin me and throw me into the water if I stole his tour guide thunder."
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 12:10 am (UTC)(link)
"Well, if Michael Meyers breaks into the house, apparently he'll go after me first and I can fight him off." Remembering that he was speaking to Natasha and not a neighbour of the Wilson's or even one of the friendly faces down by the pier, he shrugged, wanting to play it off. "According to AJ."

Sam was still paying for letting the boys watch that particular movie. Bucky liked it when the kids joked about him protecting them, though. It made him feel useful in a way that he knew concerned Sam and Sarah. Whenever the boys brought up anything pertaining to Bucky's almost invisible violent nature, they exchanged worried looks, like it was enough to make him pack up his shit and leave.

He leaned heavily against the living room's wall. "You want a drink or something?"
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 12:44 am (UTC)(link)
He easily slunk into the kitchen, at ease with a task at hand. Doing something meant he didn't have to think. Grabbing two glasses from a high cupboard, he moved easily to the fridge for ice in the freezer and a large bottle of cooled water.

"He has two," he said, back to her. Busying himself with the drinks, it was a lot easier to talk about Sam—or Sam's life—than any elephants in the room. There were huge ones, shaped as the Winter Soldier, like Steve, and being on two different sides in Germany. Many of the Avengers seemed to have moved on from the debacle of destroying an airport, but Bucky held onto it.

"AJ and Cass. They ask a lot of questions and give a lot of answers. They're pretty smart for kids."

He held out her glass for her to take.

"So, be ready to answer a lot of random questions."
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 01:14 am (UTC)(link)
"Maybe nine and thirteen?" He scrunched up his face as he tried to remember the ages that they'd both thrown at him. "They'd tell you that they're one hundred and something. Apparently, it's cool to be old." And neither of them wanted Bucky to feel alone at his age. The kids were nice, a lot nicer than they should be around him, but Bucky wasn't going to complain.

He didn't drink from his glass, leaning against the counter. It felt a little strange to be in Sam's house with Sam's friend who came here to help Sam. The less he thought about it, the easier it was to relax by the most minute amount.

He twisted against the counter, resting his metal hand on top of it. "I actually need to get outside and finish something before Sarah comes back. You can stay in here if you want or you can be an accessory to me going against my word."
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 01:52 am (UTC)(link)
"Stuff."

A very informative answer. Grinning lopsidedly, he picked up his glass and shrugged a shoulder.

Taking that as her choice to come outside with him rather than linger inside of a quiet and empty home, he pushed off from the counter and began to walk out of the kitchen, suspecting that she'd follow. Natasha didn't strike him as the type to dig her heels in when she was curious about something—and, as arrogant as he knew it wasn't, he knew she was curious about him. It was smart to be. She knew him at his worst.

He stepped outside and held the back door open for her.

"Sarah banned me from doing things around her house, so I decided to ignore that ban. It's better than sitting on the couch."
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 02:13 am (UTC)(link)
He easily led her to the back of the house, mindful of the toys AJ and Cass had left in their wake. Some of them were broken yet still enjoyed by the boys, while a few of them—bikes, skateboards, rollerskates—were left haphazardly on the grass as if the boys had been in a rush to get somewhere else.

Towards the very corner of the house, he'd set up a ladder leaning against the gutters and had random tools splayed out on the grass.

Bucky kept his back to Natasha. "Her gutters are sagging and she won't let me fix them." Once he found himself near his ladder, he took a step back and peered up the length of the house, looking past Natasha and momentarily listening for any sounds of gravel and dirt crunching beneath the tyres of Sarah's truck. When he seemed content with hearing nothing but the sounds of the outside world, he placed his glass on the porch railing and wiped his hands on the back of his jeans.

Looking at her, he forced a grin—this time, it wasn't out of a desire to try and recite a script he'd been given as homework, but as a joke—and began to tug his sleeves up to the crook of his elbows, starting with his right before tucking his left. "I need you to be my eyes and ears."
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 02:58 am (UTC)(link)
It was pretty easy to return to the task at hand despite the interruption of Natasha's arrival. Bucky always worked best taking care of other people. It was the easiest thing to get lost in; despite all the years he'd lost doing the complete opposite, it still came naturally to him. It was comforting to know that being Hydra's fist couldn't exactly strip away everything that made him feel like himself.

Glancing at her from the corner of his eye, he scooped up the leaves, twigs and random small stones in the gutter with the hand that wasn't on the side Natasha was closest to. The last thing he needed was to accidentally toss gutter waste on top of Natasha Romanoff. There weren't any nearby airports to destroy.

"So..." He turned his face away to wince; he used to be so good at conversation. Easily pick up something to say, charm the metaphorical pants off of someone with a sweet anecdote, and happily stand confidently in front of that person. That was something Hydra had taken from him. "What have you been doing?"

While Bucky was content to work in silence—and often did, even by the water's edge with all the boats lined up against the pier—it felt strange to do so with Natasha. If Sam was here, he wouldn't have anything to worry about.
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 03:32 am (UTC)(link)
"I bet."

With the gutter cleared as much as he liked, he pushed his left hand into its side with a grunt. The gutter moaned—too much pressure—and he began to tug at it, too lightly at first and then almost too forcefully. Still trying to get used to the strength in his arm; it felt like it was something he was always going to struggle with.

"You don't do anything else?" He glanced at her before returning his attention to the gutter. Best to try and get this bad boy fixed long before Sarah came home. If he was lucky, she wouldn't notice it was fixed and he wouldn't be on the receiving end of one of her pleased yet quietly reprimanding looks. "Non-work stuff?"

Did she do anything that wasn't work?
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 03:51 am (UTC)(link)
Without looking down at her, he said casually, "Mine are dead." Kind of obvious, given his age. He shrugged easily. "Killed some of them, too."

Bucky bore the death of Howard Stark heavily. It was one of the few that he remembered in such vivid detail that he sometimes wished for the selfish easy way out of a memory wipe. But remembering Howard meant that he was himself. James Barnes was still there, even if he couldn't look himself in the mirror sometimes.

But he said it to make a point. He didn't want her to feel sorry for him; he wanted her to realise how pathetic that excuse was, especially to him. He was the Hermit Soldier these days.

Curling his hands around the gutter lightly, he looked down at her in amusement. "If I can have a hobby, I'm sure you could have two." Returning to the gutter, he said playfully, "That's kind of pathetic. Old man Barnes is outdoing you in the being normal department."

Shaking his head, he chuckled to himself. Guess looks really were deceiving. Natasha Romanoff seemed like she had her shit sorted, and yet, here she was, admitting her shit was not sorted at all.
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 04:20 am (UTC)(link)
Perhaps it was in her best interests that the Wilsons had the impeccable timing of arriving just now. It didn't work for him—he hadn't quite finished his task at hand, but he knew that when Sarah eventually found him at the top of the ladder, she'd only reprimand him for not understanding the concept of being a guest.

Bucky didn't descend the ladder, watching as Sam smiled brightly at what he presumed to be a smile in return. He returned to his task at hand, trying to manipulate the gutter so that he didn't have to replace it with anything else. Natasha's comments didn't upset him. It was clear that he struck a nerve. It was clear she didn't want to talk to him about who she truly was either out of worry he'd flip a switch and become the Soldier again or she simply didn't like him. It was easier to stomach the latter.

"I didn't give her the grand tour," he drawled loudly, only glancing at the two of them from the corner of his eye. "I know I give shit tours."

He knew Sam was nodding vigorously, telling Natasha that was damn right.
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[personal profile] disparaged 2021-07-21 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
Seven minutes later, Bucky tried to sneak through the back door. Quietly opening it and trying to silently close it, he gestured with a hand across his neck for Cass not to say a word despite pulling his shoulders down in his usual expression of excitement whenever he saw Bucky. Thankfully, he obeyed this time, pretending to look down at his homework while his gaze was glued to Bucky trying to tiptoe into the kitchen.

It was no use trying to sneak in. Sarah's head immediately snapped to him; with her hands on her hips, she shook her head. "How many times have I told you not to touch my house? You're just as bad as Sam—you don't listen."

"Hey, hey, hey," Bucky held his hands up, a lopsided smile on his face. Sam's brows furrowed as he appeared offended by this accusation, peering at Bucky and then settling his gaze on Natasha to express his incredulity. "There's no need to get nasty."

After a moment of stern glaring, her Sarah's broke into a smile. "Thank you." She walked behind Cass and gripped his shoulders gently, kissing the top of his head almost impulsively.

Bucky made his way to the kitchen sink to wash his hands. As he did so, he heard Sam say to Natasha, "I listen." Hand to heart, he told her as seriously as he could, "I'm a listener. I'm a damn good listener. Unlike grandpa here, I don't need a hearing aid."

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